is what Misaki says when she means Happy Birthday and so tonight when we called my dad to wish him the same, I told her, say Happy Birthday to Grandpa and she didn't change it to Happy Day but pronounced it perfectly, just as I had, I was sad
Because I want her to stay "yittle"
I want the days when we ride in a car and she's watching a DVD and she wants the sound "youder Mama youder" to keep going on
Now that this is my third child, I understand better though not perfectly, what I utterly failed to see, feel and grasp with Koji and Izumi
The world is turning frantically and so is my life and theirs
And each day when they wake up now I can almost see how much bigger they are than the day before
I wonder how I will see them in heaven
I suppose they will be their very best selves, beyond what I know or imagine
But some of these days I think,
that best self will be just how they are right now
Right now.
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